I just wanted to say....

I HATE PACKING!!!!

IKKK!!! It's the worst!

So much so fast!!

It's all happening so quickly.

Bobby got his job back at Crystal Springs, which we knew was going to happen. He signed his job offer Oct. 9th, which marked 7 months since the day we left Birmingham. Kind of odd. They are paying him the same, plus an extra 100.00 a week until the 1st of the year. After the 1st of the year they go on commission and that's where the real money will be. They make money off of each bottle, cooler rental, new account, etc. Bobby's route is one of the biggest routes, and it's being added to. They have added a few bulk stops that take tons of water, as well as a lot of smaller stops. They are looking at anywhere from 80-120 stops a day on his route. The owner told him to expect at least a 20-30% hike in pay once they go onto commission. Bobby is excited because when he worked at Abita and Kentwood in Louisiana he was on commission and made amazing money. Close to 50,000.00 a year.

We came back to the Coast today to pack up what's been brought out sense being in the house. Not too much, thankfully. I also have to visit with my dad, because this will probably be my last weekend down here. I more than likely will not be coming back with Bobby and Jeff (Mom's husband) when they come to pack the truck. Bobby is worried about me making all of these trips back and forth, so mom and I will probably stay in Birmingham with her dog and my kitty's.

We already have an apartment. It will be ready for us to move our stuff in the weekend of the 25th-26th, which is the date they will be coming down to load the truck. Works out rather well. Mom's landlord is so amazing, she isn't charging us a deposit, or the pet deposits. She's also letting us keep the power on the apartments bill until we get settled and get our bill paid off down here, so we can get ours on up there. My mother is being amazing as well. She is getting us the rental truck, as well as paying our first months rent in the apartment. She wants us to have normalcy as soon as possible. How great is that? So by the time rent is due again, Bobby will have received two full checks, and we'll be on our way to back on track. It's only a 1 bedroom, but we don't have to sign a lease, so we can either move to a 2 bedroom in the same complex, or move out whenever we please.

I must say I'm feeling very good about all of this. God has been walking by us this entire time, since Katrina I've felt Him near us, guiding us the whole time. I don't always speak as if that's what I believe, but when I stop and breathe, I realize how blessed we truly are. This all worked out so well, and I just feel so blessed. We are going to be able to provide a decent life for this baby, which is all we can really ask for at this point.

Speaking of baby, I have an ultrasound Monday. This will be my last appointment with this crappy doctor and I couldn't be happier. Tues. or Wed. Mom and I are going to sign me up for medicaid and go ahead and make an appointment at the health dept. in Birmingham. This way I'm not having any gaps in appointments, so we will know all is well with the baby.

Thursday night mom's neighbor let us use her stethoscope and we got to hear the baby! It was amazing! I swear I heard a little burp, and we all think we heard him/her sucking his/her thumb. There were lots of "gurgles" and the baby was very active. Mom got to feel the movement, which was a lot more than what I had been feeling. It's starting to feel so real now, it's amazing. I'm so in love with this little being, and I haven't even met him/her yet. Just knowing that this little one is inside of me makes my heart melt. I can't wait till we find out what the baby is, so I can quit saying "baby" or "it" or "him/her". It will be nice to be able to say him, or her. (Which is what I want this week! ha!)

Well, that's my update for now. There probably won't be many for the next couple of weeks until we get into our apartment. Not much privacy at mom's to type in here, and I don't want her knowing about this blog. This is my place to come and let out my frustrations, fears, concerns, etc. and I want to limit who's reading it. Sometimes a girl just needs a place away from family to come and vent.

Well, until we meet again...

I've been thinking...

So I spent this morning thinking of the fun things Bobby and I used to do in Birmingham. It's funny all of the things I remember, as much as I tried to convince myself that I didn't like it there. We used to go out on "adventures" at such random times. Those are the best! I love spur of the moment, non-planned trips to "no-wheres-ville."

We would get bored and Bobby would tell me to get in the car and we'd just drive and drive. He'd take me out to the country parts of his route. It was so beautiful out there in the fall. The leaves changing colors, the air smelling so clean and fresh, horses for days, beautiful country homes and old barns. It was really beautiful. I remember telling him I'd like to live out there one day, after we had a child. Nothing better than having miles and miles for a baby to run and play. No one around to cause any time of noise pollution. Ah, the country life, I think I could get used to it.

I remember on our first anniversary we went out and stayed in Sylacauga, AL at one of his customers hotels. Then we woke up early the next morning and found our way to Talladega's national forest. It was SO beautiful out there! We hiked for 6 hours, and almost got stuck out there in the dark! It was so much fun. We came across water falls, boy scouts, wild life of all sorts. We got water from a natural spring, I think I still have the picture on here somewhere. It was so much fun!

There was another weekend, it was the last weekend of the summer. We wanted to go swimming so badly, but there is no beach there, the lakes and rivers were drying up from the drought so there wasn't any place to go swimming. I got online and found this little podunk water park up in Blount County. We paid 5 bucks for the whole day and had a huge swimming pool, different size diving boards and a few water slides to ride on. We hadn't been out in the sun in a couple of years, so we left there red as lobsters. We both peeled for days, and yes, we used sunscreen like crazy! Alabama's sun will bake you to death and you won't even know it's happening!

Oh and the best part was Chattanooga, TN on our honeymoon. Boy that place is beautiful! I can't wait until our baby is old enough to enjoy all Chattanooga has to see. The river boat, Rock City, the Inclined Railway, Lookout Mountain...the list could go on and on. That place is just so much fun!! I am looking forward to going back, only this time I want to stay in the mountains in a little cabin.

We also went out to Red Mountain a few times. They have cabins out there that I hope to stay in one day as well. I love camping, but don't think the old fashion way would be too idea pregnant, or with a child. At least not for a few years after the child is born! ;) But I'd really love to go out there and get a cabin and spend a couple of nights in the woods. Nothing like some good fresh air to get you going. They have a little lake, paddle boats, and other fun stuff like that. You can also go horse back riding through the trails, but that's a long way off for me.

I must say, I'm looking forward to the adventures again. When the baby is old enough to where we can just pack a diaper bag and a lunch and go. Or drop the baby off with mom for the day and go for a drive to get some time with one another.

It's going to be so great to have Bobby back on a "normal" schedule. Going in in the mornings, getting off in the evenings and being off on weekends. Oh how I've missed that normalcy. I'm glad that God gave us a chance to come back and realize all that we've realized in such a short amount of time. I'm also glad that He's giving us the opportunity to have back the normalcy that we had. I really have a good feeling about this, as hard as it's going to be to leave my daddy, my best friend and the beach. It's all for the greater good, for the miracle God has blessed us with, and it's going to be very much worth it in the long run.

Changes for the greater good.

So Bobby and I have been doing a lot of talking, and things just aren't working out for us here on the Coast. We have given it a good run, pushing through the obstacles, but nothing seems to be giving. He gets a good job only to be given the run around on when things are going to happen.

Well, we've run out of time. We can't do it anymore.

Bobby went to bed this past Wed. night praying to God, asking Him to lead him through his dreams. That night he had a dream about being back on the water route. The last time he had this dream we were in Birmingham, AL, and he ended up getting a job at Crystal Springs Water. So he got up Thursday, went out an applied for a few more jobs, one tried to scam him, and he was ready to give up. I got home from work and he we talked about him calling his old boss at Crystal. Both of us doubtful that there would be anything open, he gave him a ring and left him a voicemail. Not 10 mins. later the phone was ringing. It was David, Bobby's old GM at Crystal. He said that not only did they have a route open, they had his old route open! Wow! David told him he had to talk to the owner and give him a call back. So he called back Friday morning telling him that Mr. Josey said he wanted to meet with him. Bobby asked if Tuesday would be OK, David spoke to Mr. Josey about it, called back and said that was fine. Wow! Talk about FAST! So we are heading up to Birmingham, AL Monday afternoon after my doctors appointment. They will be discussing the job, pay, etc.

You know, as badly as I wanted to be back down here I never thought I'd say this, but I'm happy that this is happening. The way things are down here, I'm just terrified to bring a child into our lives. With this stable job opportunity knocking on the door, I'm feeling a lot better about the idea of a baby. Not only will we be able to stay afloat, we will have awesome medical and dental coverage again. Lately we've both been kicking ourselves for leaving all of this behind to begin with. We left it all for something we had no idea how it was going to go. Boy was that a HUGE mistake! But at least we know now. At least we can say that we honestly tried. It's just not the place we need to be right now. There aren't any good paying jobs, there aren't any doctors that have room for new patients, and the health care system in general is just nothing like it used to be...nothing here is like it used to be. I've been trying for 3 months to get a general family doctor. Every one I've called has a six month wait, or they aren't taking on new patients due to being overwhelmed already. It's scary. I can't bring a child into the picture and not be able to find a pediatrician for him/her!! What if he/she needs a specialist? And what about mommy and daddy, what are we supposed to do with no medical care?

I love my home, I love being on the beach, but the beauty around us isn't going to pay our bills. Nor will it provide the life that we both crave for our baby. We don't want our baby raised on wic, or medicaid. Not if we can prevent it, not if we can have amazing blue cross/blue shield coverage. Why should our baby have to settle because we want to live by the beach?

Living by the beach is another thing. Our baby will be coming 2 months before hurricane season starts. So if another hurricane like Katrina comes and wipes the Coast out, and we have a new baby, it'll be that much harder to start over. Why would I want to put my child through that? Why not just go ahead and start over now, and be half way to stable by the time the child comes, ya know? Why not realize that the grass isn't greener, home isn't what it used to be and that we had it freaking good in Birmingham, whether we want to admit it or not. It wasn't perfect, but what is? Our complaints about Birmingham were petty compared to what it's like here. Besides, Biloxi is 6 hours (tops) from Birmingham, we can visit whenever we want.

It's not about us anymore, it's not about what makes us happy! It's about what's best for this child, and his/her future, and there is no future here for this baby. I just wish we had known this before moving back, it would have saved us a lot of time, heartache and money. But as Bobby and I have already discussed, God wanted us to come back. He wanted to show us that the grass isn't always greener. He wanted us to have that closure, and give us a beautiful gift in the process. Now that we have our gift and the closure that we need, it's time to move forward and get settled.

I'm in constant prayer that this is the right decision, that if/when we make this move that it'll be our last. I'm so sick of moving, of instability, of so much change, but this will be for the greater good. We will stay with my mom and her husband, who have been unselfish enough to open their home to us.

I must say, my mom has been being super supportive through all of this, and offering everything she can to help us out. It's quite the change, and I love it. It's nice to know that I have someone who cares so much for us. So much they are willing to do whatever it takes to make sure we get back on our feet, and can provide everything possible for this child I'm carrying. She may drive me crazy while we're there, but at least we have her. At least I still have my mom to support me, even if it isn't exactly the way it should be. I know that sounds confusing, but my mom has her own way of thinking and doing things. It's not always the way one would expect it to be, but she does love and care for us deeply. That's a lot more than others have, and I'm grateful for that.

God willing this is what it takes, and we'll be able to provide the life that this baby deserves. God has granted us a miracle in this child that we were never supposed to have, I know He will help us provide. I just have to keep the faith, and trust in Him.

Switching doctors!

So I started at Waffle House this week. I had 2 days of classroom training, and today started my in store training on the floor. It's going pretty well, just really wears me out being pg and all. Hopefully it won't get more difficult, but easier on me.

I was speaking to a girl at work that used my doctor to deliver her son (1st pregnancy), and she about gave me a heart attack!! She told me that he gave her an infection because he left a piece of gauze in her and then sewed her up! My eyes must have gotten huge, and my eyes must have hit the floor!! I was shocked! I had some fears/concerns about him when I first met him, but thought I was just being too picky. Boy should I have listened to myself!

So I have an appointment with him Monday for some blood work, then one the following Monday for an ultrasound. I'm going to keep these appointments just because I really want to have the ultrasound, but after that, I'm not going back! No way am I going to take that chance, or a chance of him passing something/doing harm to the baby! YIKES!!!!!!

Well, I'm going to start dinner. I'm exhausted and have tomorrow before I get a day to rest. So I need to get going. Chicken takes so dang long to cook! The main reason I don't cook it often! ;) But I'm going to attempt frying okra tonight. My first attempt ever. Wish me luck!